Personal Musing: When God stirs the soul…

God stirring my soul is a apt description for where I am currently. There have been many a trial in my life and in the lives of those around me. There are trials that are right down to the question of whether the answer is “to live is Christ or die is gain” as with Janie. There are other struggles with the ongoing facing of pain and change and struggle. Each of these struggles ultimately bring us face to face with self. For me personally such is this time. Yes, I have withdrawn and gone quiet. An action of retreat and self and even hiding in trial. Perhaps it comes from feeling a life long level of isolation and disconnect. Oh, don’t get me wrong God has brought plenty of people into my life at key moments. Yet, my healing and struggles have often come down to me and God. By and large it has been a trial of one form or another that has ultimately precipitated pressing in on what God is changing and generating stirring within. I still recall to this day when God really sat me down to listen to Him about no longer acting out of compulsion and duty but being driven by his love. He allowed me to have an viral infection that made it difficult to function and He really hit me with the message of “Christ loves compels us.” Breaking down my defensiveness and fears of connecting with women had several trials and stirrings involved and a long process with frequent feedback from God guiding. All I know is right now God is stirring. The stirring starts around my initial sense of feeling stuck to now seeing and grasping the deep seat roots of reluctance and retreat. God before taught me to depend on him for defense, to be a city without walls. His lesson now is taking that even deeper to levels I don’t yet grasp. I do plan and intend on sharing parts of whatever journey God has me on in the course of this blog through such posts. Any feedback or sharing of how God is stirring in your own life is greatly appreciated. I also know I am where God wants me, even though I could have written more and not retreated. The further articles on repentance could have been written, but these posts and focus do in essence relate to the nature of repentance, sanctification, and going deeper. So, God is stirring in my life, how about yours? Care to share?